Sometimes I think I'm very forgettable, unmissable. Or easy to forget and not miss. Same thing, I think?

It's a bit depressing. I wonder why it's hard to connect with some people?

I wonder why it feels like I'm losing people, too. Losing friends to friends. It sounds ridiculous but really, I feel like it's happening.

I want to make and have the same type of friendships in college, that I've made in high school. I want to be able to talk freely, not feel like I have to contribute and just talk, to talk shit and insult carelessly and won't and don't have to worry about deeply offending someone. I want to be able to talk about kid shows that rock my imagination and fictional guys who are just so visually cream-tastic. I want to be able to mooch and be mooched off and borrow and be borrowed from. I want to be able to touch people without being self-conscious, to lean on someone without having to worry. (worry? worry about what, I wonder)

I want to be comfortable.

I'm glad I'm still in touch with the friends I've made in high school. I'm glad that I've made at least two friends in college who put me at ease.

Please don't forget me. Please keep in touch.